Laurie’s Reflections

Lesson 72: “Holding grievances is an attack on God’s plan for salvation.”

The Course teaches us to take seriously this ego draw to attack.  This is an active step.  We can be totally on our knees trying to collect ourselves from some emotional dramas that occasionally occur.  This can happen in a way where we actually get seriously tried in our efforts to counter it.  We get wrapped up in our trying to withstand the blows we received internally.  We get so rocked and we fall to our knees either figuratively and or literally and we get stuck because we feel completely overwhelmed with this sense of  fear that we can’t change the way we do things.  This is an attack on ourselves.  We can feel totally distraught about how we feel inside and not know how to find our way to a mind of peace.  This is devastating for us when we realize that we don’t know how to keep the ego at bay.  We can be at a dead end about how to heal ourselves from this emotional up and down.

A portion of the problem is definitely from our own intention and mind.  We learn how to connect with this activity of attack- and realize what we do.  We forget that we add so much by way of our intention to the picture when attack occurs; we nearly forget that we most certainly contribute to the overall energy of attack.  This is always happening and we are learning that we play a part in the rise of how much attack occurs in the world and in our minds.  Therefore, the most important thing for us to do is realize attack is always going to make us unhappy and that we just need to find our own inner willingness to keep attack from rebounding again and continuing on.

We can settle our hearts when we just remind ourselves that attack is a mistake and that we have the power to keep it in check if we listen to our Higher mind when we surrender our attachment to any idea that attack is appropriate.

The other piece is to realize that even when we can’t stop or change an attack we feel or if we can’t stop ourselves from making another person the target of our attack, the best outcome in that case is that we are totally unscathed.  Nothing impacts us because we are the children of God.

The attack may have been some condemning type of information.  Someone could be bullied to extremes. 

Even if the attack is seeming quite intense, it simply has no affect on how we feel about ourselves or how we present ourselves in the world.  

This all remains perfectly unchanged in the perception of our world.  We are God’s children so we gain all benefits that one can have in human existence.  This means that our worth can never be threatened in any way.  This means that we can hang out in our certainty that God gives us with no cost and simply be valued to ourselves and to the world.  This means that all of our problems mean nothing in the grand scheme of things.  It doesn’t matter how much attack or grievances we have with ourselves.  This all gets brushed aside in our minds because we instead are taught to fill our minds with God’s perfect forgiveness.

One extraordinary trait of God is that

in no way can we attack God. 

Even if we cling to our grievances and have not opened our minds to the willingness yet to forgive our grievances, there is no way we can change God.  We can never impact God in some negative way.  God is perfect and unchanging.  Even if we can’t change our own grievances that we carry in a greater or lesser degree, this absolutely does not change God.  God remains steadfast in the perfection as our ideal parent with a never ending love.

We can be heartened because even if we are clinging to our grievances and have a hard time releasing them and this is appears an attack on God’s salvation, the Course says is that this is impossible.   What a relief to know that God remains the steadfast force that He always has been! This means we don’ t have to resort to feeling guilty which surely happens when we take responsibility of our grievances in moments where we forget that it is unnecessary.  This means we can give all that guilt back to God’s altar.

Bless it and be done.

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