Thursday, January 22, 2015

Lesson 22: “What I see is s form of vengeance.”

Vengeance is defined as “punishment inflicted or retribution exacted for an injury or wrong.”  A lot of the time we don’t realize that the ego is actually insane.  Our egos are walking around acting like they are minding their own business, but all the time they are harboring this kind of fantasy of attack toward ourselves.  I think the ego likes to imagine that the world is out to get us so the ego can stay defended.  The ego likes for us to fight for that continuance of our defenses being up.  The ego likes to act like it has every legitimate reason to put up arms and draw swords.  It acts like violence or intention to be violent is what it is meant to do to protect us from what it deems a legitimate threat to us.

Even if in the world, we aren’t dealing ourselves with our own war or an actual threat of being violated, the ego wants us to stay on guard so that we don’t let go for a moment this shield of defense the ego has us making.  The insanity is that this defensiveness the ego creates over what it thinks is justifiable potential harm just results in our feeling weak.  Because, when we feel like we have to defend ourselves we feel vulnerable.  This is the reason we get weak when we start to believe in the ego’s need for defenses.

We just have to realize what the ego is actually doing.  Much of the time the ego can look harmless.  And when we think of the ego we may even picture our bodies or that with which we identify.  We are often the last one to notice what the ego’s true intention is when it comes to this vision of everything- it is actually a source of vengeance.  We tend to think the ego is not going to cause us trouble so we don’t look deeply at it.  We are just asked to do our part to understand that in this belief system that violence in the mind is justified is the bottom line of the ego.  Let’s tend to this carefully, take a deep breath, and remember that our certainty with God is our ultimate power and protector.  Don’t buy into the need to take on a victim role.

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